A.Word.A.Day -- AWADmail Issue 1010

You look great in a mask!
-Chris Milburn, Cape Breton, Canada (milburn.chris gmail.com)

While working in construction we would often say “Good enough for who it’s for.”
-W. Dan Houck, Yorkville, California (wdan48 gmail.com)

In yesterday’s The New York Times, an article about David Graeber and David Wengrow’s new book The Dawn of Everything contained a wonderful charientism: “Graeber recalled how a friend, after reading his similarly sweeping Debt: The First 5,000 Years, said he wasn’t sure anyone had written a book like that in 100 years. ‘I’m still not sure it was a compliment,’ Graeber quipped.”
-Jerry Delamater, New Haven, Connecticut (comjhd hofstra.edu)

Maybe a self-directed charientism, I’ve always been fond of declaring “I am not your average idiot!”
-Paul Garfinkel, San Francisco, California (paul.garfinkel gmail.com)

I can’t tell you how much I’ve enjoyed reading A.Word.A.Day!
-Jay Liverman, Falls Church, Virginia (jay.liverman gmail.com) A pharmacist friend once told me about a “We dispense with accuracy” overhead shown by one of her profs on the first day of her orientation.
-Lori Provenzano, Cranbrook, Canada (silk3.14 gmail.com)

When someone is proud of their “perfect” lawn, I say, “Wow! Your lawn is completely weed-free”. They think that I am admiring their lawn. In fact, I am saying how much I despise them. I know that the only way they can do this is to use herbicides. They are willing to pollute the planet and poison wildlife (and any children or pets that venture onto the lawn) just for a nonsensical goal, and they waste a large amount of time and money to do so.
-Tom Pedretti, Mt. Horeb, Wisconsin (motmai9195 gmail.com)

“There may be something in what you say.”
-Joyce Green, Salt Lake City, Utah (jebgreen yahoo.com)

To my friend when he voices a good idea: “Wow, you are smarter than you look!” Usually augmented with, “No, seriously, a LOT smarter.”
-Steven Lipschultz, Truckee, California (mrweevy yahoo.com)

I can’t wait to say nice things about you at your funeral.
-David Jensen (via website comments)

I’m a Jazz musician. Here are two from the bandstand; one before and one after the gig.
“Tonight I want you to play like you’ve never played before.”
“I really liked what you were trying to do tonight.”
-Reade Whitwell, Seattle, Washington (yestertek gmail.com)

You never looked better!
-Patricia Skidmore Pierce, Cleveland, Tennessee (p2pierce bellsouth.net)

Whenever I hear the Flashdance song “Maniac”, the line “And she’s dancing like she’s never danced before” makes me smile. It probably isn’t meant to be a charientism, but it sounds like one!
-Katherine Harper, Rocky River, Ohio (kharper4 gmail.com)

From the movie Men in Black after testing (and failing) “the best of the best” from the military: “Congratulations gentlemen, you’re everything we’ve come to expect from years of government training.”
-Michael Parks (via website comments)

From a job website commercial, some secretary quitting her job by saying:
“I can’t tell you what a pleasure it’s been working for you. Really, I can’t.”
When I quit working as a cashier at McDonald’s in high school, I changed “Can I help you?” to “Can you be helped?” and it took at least half a dozen customers before one of them realized something was off.
-Glenn Glazer, Felton, California (glenn.glazer gmail.com)

Several years ago, my wife and I met a couple whose friendship we did not particularly want to pursue. They told us that they would call us when their schedule was free for a dinner out but that they would not be available for a while. I answered them saying, “We’d be more than happy to wait.”
-Kenneth Graiser, Sandy Springs, Georgia (kenn_grai yahoo.com)

When I worked in a hospital in England, a Nursing Officer was notorious among her underlings for her interference in everything. One of my fellows started referring to her as Miss Management and shared this with the woman thus designated, who preened herself greatly at this mark of appreciation. (I don’t think she ever worked out the true import.)
-Denise Thorn, Grantown-on-Spey, Scotland (denisethorn gmail.com)

Thank you for your suggestion. I shall give it all the consideration it deserves.
-Judy Malkin, Toronto, Canada (jgmalkin rogers.com)

My dad used to tease me with:
“I almost got into a fight over you the other day.”
“Why, Dad?”
“I was talking to a man who said you weren’t fit to live with the pigs! But I said you were.”
-Tracy Johnston, Vista, California (trackyj att.net)

The late John Bustin, a theater and music critic in Austin, Texas, was known for saying to performers after less than stellar presentations, “Well, you’ve done it again.”
-Laura Burns, Galveston, Texas (laurab12 sbcglobal.net)

To a performer after a concert:
Oh, my dear, “superb” isn’t the word!
or
You couldn’t have played better!
-Bernard Jacobson, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania (bernardijacobson comcast.net)

My stepmother, Adrienne Block, was a musician and musicologist, and sometimes went to concerts by people she knew - and didn’t enjoy them. She had a collection of things to say, like “Only you could have done it!”
-Elizabeth Block, Toronto, Canada (elizabethblock netzero.net)

Upon receiving a useless gift, my husband frequently wrote the following in his thank-you note: You can’t imagine how often we have used your gift.
-Helen Dickerson, Poughkeepsie, New York (helen_dickerson hotmail.com)

In the movie Shakespeare in Love, Shakespeare says to Marlowe “I love your early work,” which is a charientism because it implies that Marlowe’s recent work has suffered a decline.
-Michael Klossner, Little Rock, Arkansas (klossner9 aol.com)

In a referee report: This paper fills a much needed hole in the literature.
-Sigurd Angenent, Madison, Wisconsin (angenent math.wisc.edu)

In a book review: These authors couldn’t have written a better book.
-Tom Louis, Washington, DC (tlouis jhu.edu)

When asked to give recommendation for a potential hire: “I can’t say enough good things about him.”
-Hedy Witte, Fredericksburg, Virginia (hswitte msn.com)

I once hit a beautiful golf shot that landed on the green. One of my playing partners exclaimed, “Wow! Nice shot. That’s way beyond your ability.”
-Tom Lund, Minneapolis, Minnesota (tomelund aol.com)

The cognitive psychologist Prof. Philip Johnston-Laird, when introducing a (well-known to him) visiting lecturer to undergrads at Sussex Uni, declared, “We could not find a better speaker on this subject.”
-Peter Daw, Salisbury, UK (petersdaw gmail.com)

A Southernism that is understood by nearly every American southerner is “Bless her/his heart.” As in, “She’s put on a few pounds, bless her heart.” It’s a criticism disguised as an endearment, I guess to exonerate the speaker from being catty.
-Tappy Phillips, Naples, Florida (tappyp aol.com)

After attending a play, the comment: “You don’t know what you’ve done!” was made with much emotion and wringing of hands. The director thought he had a hit. Not so.
-Linda Allen, San Diego, California (lindaja mac.com)

A friend of mine had made strudel for the first time. My father, on finishing his piece, remarked, “Well, there’s nothing wrong with that!”
-Judith Singer Swartz, Marietta, Georgia (kelev52 gmail.com)

One vain old actress introducing another: “Jane is my OLDEST friend.”
-Dawn Drzal, New York, New York (dawndrzal aol.com)

My former brother-in-law, a minister and very picky eater, was often presented with baked goods from the women in his congregation. Repulsed by many of those dishes, he would often say truthfully, “My, my! That sure won’t last long at my house!”
-Russell Lott, Hattiesburg, Mississippi (russellwlott comcast.net)

Reminds me of Kennedy’s observation about Washington: Northern charm and Southern efficiency.
-George Hawkins, Houston, Texas (hawkinsgeorge3 gmail.com)

In college, my ex-husband used to sit in his physics class and each time the professor would ask him a question, he would reply, “I don’t know” (even when he did -- he didn’t like being called on). Finally the professor said, “Kaminsky! What you don’t know would fill volumes!”
-Ivy Kaminsky, Houston, Texas (ivykaminsky yahoo.com)

An Oxford don, famous for (and proud of) never writing a bad student recommendation, was asked to write one for the laziest student he had ever taught. After giving the matter considerable thought -- since neither did he wish to lie -- he wrote to the potential employer: “Dear Sir, If you can get him to work for you, you will be lucky!” (This putatively true story was told to me by a former colleague of his.)
-Eric Miller, Norwich, Vermont (ericmiller1957 gmail.com)

Nobody would be better in this job than him.
-Ron Johnson, Penticton, Canada (ronjohnson telus.net)

In response to a request to do something, my response is typically “Nothing would make me happier.” I generally acquiesce to the request, but reserve the right to consider it worse than doing nothing at all.
-Jeff Sconyers, Seattle, Washington (sconyers.jeff gmail.com)

Oh, you look nice today; that dress is very slimming.
-Mi Dama, New York (midamayo hotmail.com)

My brother, a mathematician, in a conversation with my mother, expounded at length on an esoteric concept totally out of her realm of knowledge or understanding. At one point, he paused, and she said, “You must find that fascinating.”
-Will Hobbs, Portland, Oregon (willhobbs01 hotmail.com)

My wife’s grandfather was gifted in charientism. He once had an unexpected visitor who overstayed his welcome. When the man finally left, he said in a very cheery voice, “George, it’s been great seeing you today. Any time you’re passing by, please do!”
-Peter Scandrett, Eastwood, Australia (scandrett optusnet.com.au)

The phrase “with all due respect” (mentally italicizing “due”).
-Chamundi Sabanathan, Kauai, Hawaii (chamundi sonic.net)

As a young teacher many years ago, taking up my first high school teaching post, I found it a challenge coping with one class of particularly spirited young students. The group ringleader and self-appointed class clown, a bright young fellow named William, was especially troublesome, always attempting to disarm and embarrass me in front of his lively classmates by posing awkward and disconcerting questions whenever the opportunity arose. I wondered what comment would be appropriate to record on the report card to be sent to his parents: after all, despite his antics he had actually completed all of his classwork satisfactorily. In the end I wrote: ‘William is trying’.
-Beverly Bird, Cape Town, South Africa (bevbird me.com)

He’s a legend in his own mind.
-Glenn Cheney, Hanover, Connecticut (glenn cheneybooks.com)

Long ago, a tutor of mine would say of something awful: “It is a splendid example of its type.”
-John Hall, Kirklington, UK (john hallborders.com)

Thank you for your support. I know you’ll always be behind me.
-Daniel Kennedy, Vienna, Austria (dkennedyco aol.com)

An actor friend of mine knows what to say when she has seen a less than wonderful performance: Darling! Marvellous isn’t the word.
-Yan Christensen, Berkhamsted, UK (briar9 btinternet.com)

Prior to about 1970 if someone said they had an exceptional child it meant they were gifted. Then the term took on a new meaning “An exceptional child is one who deviates physically, intellectually, emotionally, and socially so markedly from what is considered to be normal growth and development.” I was unaware of that the first time someone told me they had an exceptional child. I’m glad I didn’t cause a scene when I said “That’s nice” or something to that effect.
I can now use the term as a charientism as in “My! What as exceptional person you are!” or when it is pointed out that the US is the only industrialized western country without maternity or family leave, national healthcare, etc. I just say, “That’s American Exceptionalism for you.”
-Charles E. Steele, Jr., Leyte, Philippines (c-steele onu.edu)

Is there a word for a compliment phrased as an insult? For instance, Max Beerbohm’s description of his heroine Zuleika Dobson, in the novel of the same name: “Zuleika was not strictly beautiful. Her eyes were a trifle large, and their lashes longer than they need have been ... The mouth was a mere replica of Cupid’s bow ... Her neck was imitation marble. Her hands and feet were of very mean proportions. She had no waist to speak of.”
-Joan Biella, Kensington, California (jbiella2632 gmail.com)